I feel defeated right now. I am taking so many medications, plus I’m doing ECT. When will it end? I’m frustrated….I have been battling depression with all I got and I have seen little improvement. I’m still not working because I can’t drive. I can’t drive because of the ECT. F&CK!! when will it end? I just want my life back. I’m getting my brain electrocuted for peat sake. What more do I need to do? I’m going to have 2 therapists to talk to, which I really need to talk to someone right now. I’m supposed to be a functioning, working , single mother. How do I explain this to my child? I can’t give up because I’ll end up back in the hospital. I need to keep trying and push through this. It’s bad enough I have to deal with my physical pain of my autoimmune disease. It’s the main reason I’m depressed in the first place. The other reason is that I still haven’t come to terms with my divorce and I don’t know if I ever will.